Today, I am going to celebrate the second birthday of my first daughter, Noelle. Although she is not by my side, I know she is looking down from heaven and smiling.

I am going to focus on how my life has transformed in the last two years because of her. She is one of the greatest blessings in my life. She has made me the best Mom I can be. She is the reason I kiss Lily longer and hug her tighter. She has made me a better person- She is the reason I strive to be the best nurse practitioner I can be every day... you never know what someone is going through. She has made me appreciate life, love and time.

I will forever wonder who my sweet Noelle would be today. My heart will forever ache when I think back to 2 years ago today. Was she in pain? Did we do the right thing? Why didn't I hold her longer? Why didn't I bathe her? Why didn't I give her one more kiss?

But I refuse to dwell on every decision we made. I refuse to question my past. I want to focus on the now and how we have kept Noelle's life shining here on earth, even though her time here was brief.

We are launching a campaign with Ronald McDonald House that will help fetal families staying in the home. It will give these families financial relief while they are undergoing fetal surgeries and making time sensitive decisions for their unborn child that can have a big financial impact. We are striving to give these families hope and support.

Noelle's life may have been brief, but it was beautiful. I don't know who I would be today without her, I don't know where I would be. All I know is that she made me a Mother two years ago today and for that, I am proud and overjoyed. I can't wait to kiss her in heaven someday. Until then, I will make sure that her light continues shining here on earth.

I carry her heart always, I carry it in my heart.

Happy 2nd birthday in Heaven, baby Noelle.

I hope you dance and sing, laugh and yell.

Run free like the wind, without a care

I know you'll look adorable, no matter what you wear!

I hope you get lots of Kisses from all the Grammies

I'm sure they'll let you eat lots of candy!

Enjoy the magic of heaven and the angel's songs,

One day, I hope to be by your side, singing along.

I imagine bright sunshine and ear to ear smiles

I wish I could be there, but we'll have to wait a little while.

Until then, know this my girl

You will always be my baby, my love, my world.

I love you, Noelle. Happy 2nd Birthday.